You know you've been in the band too long....

  1. When you hear music and start marking time.
  2. When you walk in step with the person in front of you.
  3. When you try to guess the tempo of your favorite song.
  4. When you point out key changes and dynamics while listening to the radio.
  5. When you like wearing your uniform.
  6. When people ask you about your social life and you say, "Oh, you mean my flute/trumpet/drum/etc.?"
  7. When people worry when they see you without your instrument.
  8. When band camp is FUN.
  9. When you respond to "band kid."
10. When your instrument has a name. .
11. When you see your section more than you see your family.
12. When you think practices should last a half-hour longer.
13. When you accidentally call you band director "Dad."
14. When You think Louie Louie is the best song ever written
15. When you can put your uniform on in less than 10 minutes.
16. When reeds taste good.
17. When you have a neck strap/harness tan line.
18. When you roll/glide step while you walk to class.
19. When you root for the other football team to lessen the time of your season.
20. When you subconsciously start humming your music.
21. When you know not only your own part, but everyone else's too.
22. When the drummers actually start to make sense.
23. When you wear your band shirt in public.
24. When your furniture is dented from banging drumsticks on it.
25. When you get the jokes on this list.

MURPHY'S LAWS OF MUSIC

• Communication Principle
    •When a conductor gives students letters for parents, 15% will be left on music stands, 25% will be inside the music, 15% will rot in instrument cases, 15% will be left in lockers, 15% will crawl under the student's bed, and 15% of the parents will receive the letter.

• Premature Deafness Ratio
    •A conductor's hearing loss is directly proportional to how many percussionists are started each year.

• Murphy's Music Stand Principle
    •The music stand you get will wobble

• Lost and Found Principle of Music Folders
    •At least one music folder will be left on a music stand after each rehearsal.
•Corollaries
    •1. It will usually be the same player.
    •2. If it is not the same player, there will be no name in the folder.

• Law of Doors
    •The largest of the timpani is always four inches wider than the door to the auditorium.

• Law of Clarinet Squeaks
    •Clarinet squeaks always occur in the most exposed sections of the music.

• Murphy's Law of Clapping
    •If the audience can clap at the wrong time, they will.

• Left-Right Principle
    •At least one person is out of step in any one march. 
•Corollary
  •It is usually the same person.

• Law of Lost Drumsticks
    •Percussionists will lose sticks.
  •Corollaries
    •1. Percussionists always claim the sticks were stolen.
    •2. The lost sticks will be found the day after new ones are bought.

• Murphy's Law on Instruments
    •An instrument always breaks at the worst possible time.
  •Corollary
    •The instrument will belong to a first chair player.

• Law of Selective Operation
    •Brass valves will stick on contest days.
  •Corollaries
    •1. They will not stick when the conductor tries them
    •2. They will stick again when the student resumes playing.